Hers, Mine & Ours After Divorce - Single Dad Needs Advice!

I received the following inquiry from a stressed-out single dad:

Dear Honoree,
I'm recently separated from my second wife, and we're in the process of divorce. We have a child, and we've worked out a visitation schedule that we agree on. Also, I've played the role of dad to her daughter with her first husband since he's not around all that much and doesn't take an active role in her life. My soon-to-be ex expects me to take both kids when I'm supposed to have visitation, and although I want to see my former step-child, I don't want there to be that expectation with my ex, and I don't want to hurt the child. What should I do?
Victor

Dear Victor,
My advice is to see your former step-daughter in small doses - mainly when you're picking up and dropping off your child. I don't think your ex's expectation of visitation with both kids is acceptable, and when she finds her next relationship/husband, that will cause even more confusion. You don't mention the real father, except to say he's not all that involved. How would he feel about your continued involvement with his child? You will want to check with your attorney about legal issues as well.
Honoree

Dads, what advice do you have for Victor?






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HonorĂ©e Corder has dedicated her life to being a positive force for good. She writes personal and professional growth and development books, and The Successful Single Mom book series. As an executive coach and corporate trainer, she turns service providers into rainmakers, average producers into rock-stars, and dreams into reality. For more information on how she can specifically help you or your organization, click here.

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