“Oh Shit” Day: The Day that
Turned Your Lives Upside Down
This day could have been yesterday, or perhaps
it was ten years ago. The day you became a single dad is, without question, one
of the hardest days of your life. This is the day many men have hoped for,
regardless whether they come from an abusive, hopeless, or simply dissatisfying
situation, and yet dread at the same time. There’s a chance you will have
freedom: the opportunity to turn your life around and make it the way you want
it … then there’s the reality check: how is it possible to get everything done
and retain your sanity? Pay the bills? Raise the children?
My daughter went from being a happy, normal
two-year-old one day, to being a clingy, needy, demanding, temper-tantrum
throwing Tasmanian Devil the next. She seemed to sense how unsettled I was
feeling and almost instantly began reacting and acting out based upon my mental
state. On top of my pending divorce, I now had a sick feeling in the pit of my
stomach regarding how my daughter was going to be affected – short and
long-term – by this new situation and the dark clouds over head. Here’s the
kicker: I didn’t want to burden anyone with my feelings and insecurities, so
sadly I kept most of them to myself. I didn’t ask for help – I didn’t know how.
I didn’t know what was going to happen next and I wasn’t sure how to navigate
what was coming.
Did you live that day in your mind a thousand
times prior to it actually happening? Before I separated from my ex-husband, I
used to think a lot (daydream is probably a better word) about what it would be
like to be single again, have my freedom and raise my daughter on my own.
